By David
When my daughter Jane was at high school in New Zealand her favourite subject was English. In the national School Certificate English exam she scored 96%. Her short stories were published in various New Zealand publications and won a collection of encyclopaedias for her high school in a British Council international competition.
When I began writing for Swimwatch I studied Jane’s stories and asked her advice on how to improve my literary efforts. She told me to never begin a story with the sentence, “We packed up the car and went to Waimarama.” For those of you unfamiliar with Waimarama, it is a beach in Hawke’s Bay that the internet tells me is a “golden, sandy surf beach close to shops and takeaways.” She said it was a boring start to a story that would inevitably be equally boring. With all that, by way of introduction, I now want to tell you a story about what happened in Hamilton last weekend.
Mike Byrne packed up the car and went to Hamilton. His purpose was to attend the New Zealand Inter-Secondary Schools Swimming Championships. Two of the swimmers I help were competing in the meet. A few other friends were lucky enough to be chosen by Mike Byrne to hear his tale of Swimming New Zealand woe. He really should know better.
With up to 1,000 New Zealanders now reading Swimwatch every day Byrne should realize that most groups he talks to will include a Swimwatch mole. In Hamilton that was certainly true. Within hours I was called and told that Mike Byrne had just told my friends the following story.
According to Byrne, Brian Palmer, the CEO of the Auckland Region was opposed to Project Vanguard because if Project Vanguard succeeded Brian Palmer would be out of a job. Brian Palmer was entirely motivated by self interest. Byrne also said, Bronwen Radford was leading the sport into a catastrophic position that would certainly mean SPARC would withdraw its funding. Radford was an inexperienced Regional administrator meddling in affairs she did not understand and was ill equipped to handle. And finally the Auckland Region was acting dishonestly by registering learn to swim swimmers as Swimming New Zealand members. Auckland’s sole motive was to increase the Region’s voting power at Annual and Special General Meetings. Auckland was treating New Zealand’s other Regions with contempt and dishonour.
When you listen to this sort of stuff, you can’t help but wonder whether there is any limit to Byrne’s fraudulent claims. Take the Brian Palmer story. I have been to four Project Vanguard events put on by Brian Palmer and the Auckland Region. Not once have I detected any semblance of self interest in his presentations. Besides, Brian Palmer is employed by the Auckland Region to look after its affairs. I’m pretty sure Auckland will always choose to look after its own affairs, rather than trust anything to those who have made a ruinous mess of running Swimming New Zealand. The Ineson Report was written about Mike Byrne’s world, not Brian Palmer’s. The real danger in Project Vanguard is that its progress could cause Brian Palmer such despair that he looks elsewhere for employment. That would be a tragic loss for swimming in New Zealand. The departure of Mike Byrne on the other hand would be progress for us all.
The one insight provided by Byrne’s comment about Brian Palmer is that there is a clear intention to “rape and pillage” Regional staff if Byrne gets the opportunity. Byrne can’t wait for the chance to get even with Brian Palmer. A Swimming New Zealand’s takeover of the Regions would certainly be hostile. At least that’s what Mike Byrne says.
As for the claim that Bronwen Radford is about to cost us all SPARC’s funding – that is just not true. If you said that Mike Byrne – you are a two faced shameful liar. I have been to meetings, read news items and studied reports from the CEO of SPARC. Not once have I heard Miskimmin link the efforts of Radford to reform the Swimming New Zealand Board with the amount of SPARC’s funding. In fact on several occasions I’ve heard Miskimmin deny that there is any connection. I have heard him link the amount of funding SPARC gives swimming to Byrne’s performance. Byrne is responsible for a failing High Performance unit. That is certainly Miskimmin’s concern. Byrne needs to get out of the bloody way so that those who know what it takes to win a swimming race can do it – and save SPARC’s funding in the process.
While I am on the subject of SPARC’s funding, I wrote recently that all SPARC’s $1.6 million was spent on the Cameron and Byrne’s high performance empire. I was wrong. Evidently SPARC set aside $150,000 for “grass roots” swimming. But do you know what Byrne spent it on – Project Vanguard, that’s what. While my club and most clubs in the country had kids that could barely afford training fees, Mike Byrne was spending “grass roots” money on airfares and hotels to cart Hemsworth and her Project Vanguard side show around the country. And he says Bronwen Radford is putting swimming’s funding at risk. He is a sick, sick joke.
My Waikato friends were quite shaken by Byrne’s revelation that Auckland was registering learn to swim members. Could this be true? Was Auckland up to no good? The answer is that, yes it was true and no Auckland was acting just fine. For years many New Zealand Regions have registered learn to swim students as Swimming New Zealand members. That never worried Byrne when it was Mark Berge’s tame Wellington Region that was doing the registering. It was all good fun then. Byrne could and did talk up the healthy increase in numbers. But when Auckland decided to follow Berge’s example and register a very small proportion of its learn to swim community, it all became a problem. The new voting college accurately reflects the number of swimmers in each Region. In the year I have been in Auckland I have observed closely the work of those that run the affairs of the Auckland Region. Auckland is conducting itself just fine. They are good people, trying to reform a broken head office. They can be trusted. For someone from Central Otago I do not say that lightly.
After the Ineson Report it is Byrne who is in danger of losing his job. It is Byrne who has put SPARC’s funding at risk. And it is Byrne who taught us to register learn to swim students. Check it out, before you believe a word he says.