This week I have spoken to two people who were born in the Middle East. One of course is Eyad. He was born in Syria before coming to New Zealand as a refugee three or four years ago. The other is a Palestinian born nurse who is part of the team taking care of me at North Shore Hospital. Both are lovely people. New Zealand really lucked out when they decided to make this place their home.

One of our conversations was about the CBS foreign correspondent, Charlie D’Agata who in relation to the war in Ukraine said:

“This isn’t a place, with all due respect, like Iraq or Afghanistan, that has seen conflict raging for decades,” he commented. “You know, this is a relatively civilized, relatively European – I have to choose those words carefully, too – city where you wouldn’t expect that or hope that it’s going to happen.”

I can’t imagine anything more racist than those 51 words. Killing Afghans and Iraqis, that’s fine. Americans have been killing them for decades. It is almost a national sport.  Afghans and Iraqis are used to it. But blue eyed, white, civilized Europeans, dear me no. “You wouldn’t expect that or hope it is going to happen to them”   

D’Agata’s casual dismissal of Middle East lives as target practice for the American war machine is a disgrace. Matched only by his elevation of European lives to a position far superior and worthy of protection. What on earth gave him the idea that it is ok to compare the value of peoples’ lives and who qualifies as civilized? Come to think of it, I do know what gave him that idea. America taught him that from the day he was born.

If that is D’Agata’s idea of, choosing his words carefully, I’d hate to think what he would say after a few drinks with his white friends on a Saturday night in New York. Does he frequent a bar with a sign saying, “Civilized Europeans Only”? It wouldn’t surprise me.

I told Eyad and my nurse about this example of racism and asked what they thought. To my stunned surprise they gave me the same reply.

“I hear that sort of thing quite often”, they said. “Yes, even here in New Zealand. I’ve got to the stage where I just ignore it. I let it wash over me and move on. It is usually not malicious, just ignorance.”

Were they right I thought? Was prejudice and racism as prevalent as they implied. And of course, the answer is yes. Here are three examples.

A few years ago, I was General Manager of a medium sized sheepskin processing business. After my first week, the Factory Manager, Brian Cumberland, took me to the local pub to have a drink and get to know the factory workforce. As the owner of the pub poured our drinks, he apologised for the factory smells the workers brought into the bar on a Friday after work. The superior scorn in his voice was unmistakable.

Brian fixed him with a cold-as-death stare and said, “I guess the smell of their money is the same.” And turned and walked away.

Even more years ago, when I was at university, my mother and stepfather were transferred to the mining town of Westport. In the evening of our second day in the town my mother and I were walking along the main street. A member of Westport’s elite Dellaca family, came out of his shop to welcome the new arrivals to the town. His welcome included an explanation of how the coal miners lowered the class of the community.

My mother raised herself to her full 5 foot 8 inches and said, “The miners Mr Dellaca, the miners are the salt of the earth”. And turned and walked away.

During my year coaching in Saudi Arabia, a South African coach called AJ asked Eyad’s brother to drive him around town collecting grocery supplies. The purchases took longer to find than expected. AJ arrived back at the pool a few minutes late for our next session of a conference. That night I read the report AJ had sent to the Federation Head Office in Riyadh. He ripped into Eyad’s brother for causing the conference to start late. He didn’t say as much but there was a clear inference of Arabs being too lazy to get out of their own way. That could not be allowed to pass. Eyad’s brother had given up his lunch time to drive AJ around town. His thanks was a racist tirade.

The next day I took AJ aside and made it clear he was never to bring those racist views into any pool I had anything to do with. And turned and walked away.

And so, whenever racism and prejudice are found, none of us should ignore it. Bad people get away with bad things when good people do nothing. Call it out. Set them straight. They probably, “know not what they do”. But the act of not letting it pass makes New Zealand a better place.